A path less trodden|
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|Sunday, November 11th, 2012|
Running over miles of marshland and chill spring trees, immolated with love of the wild, roaring laughter - energy from inspiration by surroundings and body.
Hill rising above house. higher wooded hill looming over that.
After violence and destruction, quiet enlightenment.
Like bodies newly granted brains and thrown into the world, I met her with my eyes, widened, N DID NOT LET go, like her, until we both crossed paths.
Please everyone stop being so aloof and mysterious, show me the hidden facets of yourself immediately, those pearls at the bottom of the ocean that makes everyone unique
I'm sick to death of your whispering
|Monday, October 22nd, 2012|
3. I get scared of how to say it(?) I think you're v attractive and I love your company - it'd be awful to lose you. Can we be really cuddly friends, would that work for you?
2. I got scared cos I don't want a relationship
1. I felt like things were moving too fast and I wasn't sure where they were headed or if I communicated anything/enough. Scared I was getting left behind. This feeling always terrifies me, causes a violent reaction. Wasn't so bad with you cos you were very tactful. But I still behaved wrong, I think, not saying anything earlier.
|Wednesday, September 19th, 2012|
oh i shouldnt do that to her should i mel, that's not something you want to see, that's scary. let's play some music. and i'll carry on telling you stuff about when i saw this band and ho I looked in his eyes. I either looked a fool or that I thought he'd failed us. Immediately I could see he was different to everyone, he was more like me, if only from that look. I always seem to act on principle though.
I am weird, and I'm a 'crazy person'. What intelligent person could not be in this world?
|Thursday, November 10th, 2011|
Exclusive heterosexuality pisses me off.
Line of blonde girls. One looks at me. I look back as she passes, caught off-guard. She's sort of doing that attempt to look left whilst you're looking forward. The next girl ahead I try to ignore. I swear I just about see her look at me out of the very corner of my eye. So I look at her and she's stopped now, mouth gone sort of squidgy.
If she's looking at me I want her. Even as the next does an angry sigh as I pass - I imagine. Even as I glance pointedly at a woman who looks disconnected from this fashionable shallow sort of look, who doesn't give me a moment's thought, and anyway I'd only want to fuck her by the look.
I don't want you, I don't want you. Why do we do this.
Hey, this walking in the street game I think I am getting inured to, though.
Oh god and then I see that lesbian wind-up bitch.
|Thursday, May 19th, 2011|
The tribal warrior would abstain sexually for several days before actually going to battle. This would form part of the ritual to become the warrior, rather than simply a member of the tribe. After returning from battle, another lot of harrowing rituals would be undergone to revert back again (avoiding trauma).
Posted this ages ago, before the short oil obsession, but oh... how relevant... current situation, exactly.
I'm not miserable yet...
Just got to get through this with my dignity intact, same as before. No problem.
I'm in love can't I just enjoy it?! No, we know that, we accepted that. Cos we're special :)
Just get through this weekend. Fuck,I forgot the alcohol. looooool
|Tuesday, May 17th, 2011|
|Saturday, May 14th, 2011|
Actually finding new friends recently.
Now I'm starting to go really weird.
|Thursday, August 13th, 2009|
If I am honest about myself, I will lose what few friends I have. I am always going to be lonely.
|Monday, July 6th, 2009|
|Tuesday, June 30th, 2009|
|Fate/I'm a human being don't waste my time
The daughters of slaves
get their big fat tits out on pride marches
While other humans have their heads removed after months of runing,hiding
asking, 'why the fuck did I get born here?'
|Sunday, June 28th, 2009|
I am this and that. I'm a feminist, I want freedom, creativity, an end to greed and exploitation.
I have greater gifts than others sometimes. Sometimes I am more pathetic than others.
I am often more loving, I feel it physically the urge to just love... people. Touch, hug, connect.
Sometimes I am more fucked up than others.
I am just complicated.
Surprises me that it has to be said, really.
|Friday, June 26th, 2009|
|Thursday, June 18th, 2009|
I hate this bowl of shit world because of the people who make it that way, every day, because of the people they choose to be.
I also hate this world because I don't get the love I want from people. Indeed I am tyrannical in my desire for love.
The two phenomena are not seperate - they could both be solved by people becoming better.
|Thursday, January 29th, 2009|
The freak leaves us bereft, forcing a little
Mutilation somewhere to set things right
To wreak penance
To set the freak flags flying.
- Cynthia Macdonald, "Celebrating the Freak"
|Friday, December 28th, 2007|
Looking at these photos makes me think of pronography - seeing as i'm on a library computer, but they're not and they make me feel the opposite - warm and good. In my chest, I mean.
Internet, I summon absence of sarcasm.
I love it love it http://www.flickr.com/groups/63378431@N00/pool/page2/
|Thursday, December 6th, 2007|
The news seems to get more bizarre and depressing all the time. I don't think I'll replicate the headlines. The sun etc pisses me off too - yes, you're extremely clever realising you can get away with showing average model's bare arse on your front page, but children can easily see these things. It's confusing, is the point. There was a Skinny Puppy interview with the stated opinion that we get given this varied tide of information and it numbs us to all of it. Surely it's useless to join the voices and images. Peak oil, praise it - at least it'll kill this shit. http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/violenceservices/
On a lighter note we started psycho-analysis of Poe. Bliss.
|Thursday, November 15th, 2007|
|World Oil Peak
"The multi-dimensional meltdown underway in the finance sector illustrates perfectly how the complex systems we depend on start to wobble and fail as soon as peak oil establishes itself as a fact in the public imagination. Mainly what it shows is that we don't have to run out of oil -- or even come close to that -- before the trouble starts. Just going over the peak and heading down the slippery slope of depletion is enough...
The oil age, we will soon discover, was an anomaly. Many of the things that seemed "normal" under its regime will turn out to have been rather special. And as the beginning of the end of the oil age becomes manifest, these special things are starting to self-destruct pretty spectacularly....
Investment banker Matthew Simmons has said that the American public (and its leaders) will probably not "get" the fundamental problem with oil until rising prices are joined by spot shortages -- i.e. gas station lines, which will represent hoarding behavior on the basis of individual motorists.
(Simmons was only one of many analysts who spoke at the mid-October Houston conference put on by ASPO-USA (the Association for Study of Peak Oil))
Behind the hoarding dynamics are several clear circumstances.
One biggie is the growing export crisis, described by geologist Jeffrey Brown. Countries like Saudi Arabia and Mexico that sell oil to importing nations like The USA and Japan are using more of their own oil and producing less. Mexico's trajectory is so steep (due to the severe depletion of its giant Cantarell oil field) that it could easily go from being America's Number 3 source of imports to zero in less than five years. The anticipated yearly growth in worldwide oil demand next year will equal 80 percent of the USA's entire oil production. The export crisis is only an additional layer on top of the general peak oil situation, but it illustrates the way that complex systems we depend on -- and oil markets are one -- are liable to wobble and fail just as the world comes off the all-time oil production peak for good. Finance is another complex system and it, too, is entering a stage of robust instability. Food production is yet another, with a grain scarcity that has driven wheat prices to all-time highs. The roster of complex systems entering phase change is long and gruesome."
James Howard Kunstler
The Long Emergency
|Wednesday, November 14th, 2007|
|Saturday, September 29th, 2007|